


Lose you

by neophron



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2016-08-31
Packaged: 2018-08-12 05:07:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7921687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neophron/pseuds/neophron
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was written a day after "The Abominable Bride" and closely connected with various theories and interpretations of vague "signs" and "clues" in that special.<br/>What possibly could hide Mycroft?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lose you

**Author's Note:**

> Hugely influenced by the song "Lose You" by Pete Yorn

***  
"Sherlock, there is a letter for you here."  
" …"  
"Sherlock, a letter! Do you hear me?"  
"I'm busy, John. Leave it somewhere."  
"Alright. It's just a bit weird – there is no mentioning of the sender..."  
"No time for that now, John. We should go." 

Sherlock takes his coat and runs out. John with a sigh follows him.

***  
“What's this?” - Sherlock looks at the white envelope with just his name on it. Inside it there is only a small piece of paper with a list of different drugs. “What's this?” - he thinks again, having no idea what this letter can mean. 

“A list of drugs, just like I promised Mycroft...”

“No way” - he says that out loud, trying to come up with something else that what he thinks it means.  
“John, when did this letter come?”  
“A couple of hours ago. I told you about it, remember? Is something wrong?”  
“Yes. No. Probably. We should go.”  
“Where this time?” - John asks wearily.  
“We should find Mycroft”

John looks at him in surprise, but then just stands up and goes after him. “Sherlock, what happened?” - he asks without hope for an answer. 

Yes. There is no answer.

***

John isn't surprised by the fact that Sherlock has a key to Mycroft's house. The only thing that surprises him right now is the worried expression on Sherlock's face. His howl of despair strikes him even more. When he finally catches up with Sherlock, John sees Mycroft lying on the floor and Sherlock bending over him, almost... crying? What? It can't be true. Sherlock would never... cry?

But he is a doctor after all, and there's a body. He approaches Mycroft's body and realizes what happened. He still tries to find the pulse, refusing to believe in what he sees, but all his efforts are in vain. He understands that death took place hours before they come here.

“Sherlock, what...” he can't even finish his question.

Sherlock just gives him a piece of paper without a word. There is some names of drugs, and he doesn't understand what that means. “I don't understand what...” Oh. He realizes it. The list. The list of everything. But why would Mycroft...? John gives Sherlock an inquiring look. He shows John what he has found in Mycroft's pocket – a doctor's report. John is struck. Huntington's disease. 

***

Of course, he tested Sherlock. His negative result was an absolute relief for Mycroft. He has enough reasons to worry about his little brother without that kind of diagnosis. And still he let Sherlock down. “I promised him to always be there for him. It seems that I won't be able to stick to my words.”

“Doctor Watson. Look after him. Please.”

Watson nodded and followed Sherlock.

“Well, there isn't much I could do for him now. I just hope John will be there for him, when Sherlock will need some help. And I hope he'll forgive me. I just can't let him see me losing my mind. I can't let him be ashamed because of me.”

Mycroft always does everything carefully. He finished everything he was dealing with at work. The only thing he couldn't do was a note. He knew he should write one for Sherlock, but how could he explain everything? What could he say? “I'm sorry, Sherlock,” or “I love you, Sherlock”? How could he expect his little brother to understand it? “I want Sherlock to remember me as a smart older brother, who actually loved him. Not as a complete nutter of whom he should take care.”

“He always makes a list, knowing that I will be there for him. If I won't be able do that anymore, he'll get my list – for the first and the last time.”

***

John didn't know what to say looking at Sherlock. Tears were shedding down his face as he took two crumpled pieces of paper out of the bin.

On the first one was written “I'm sorry, Sherlock”.

On the second one - “I love you, Sherlock”.


End file.
